Our Story, Part 3: The Day Before Finals

It's usually pretty easy to tell when the day when the missionary calls are going to come. The Missionary Department at the Church Office Building sends all the new calls off on the same day, so if you know anyone else who has received a call recently, just ask them what day it came. Yours will come on the same day, usually with the same turn-around time. This was the case with Denise. We were expecting it to come on the day before finals, and it did.

After I knew the mail had come (and after spending all night long thinking about Denise), I called over to her apartment to see if her call was there. I talked to Lindsay (aka Lindsay Pants). She said the call was there. I asked if I could come over and hold it. She didn't object.

I remember very vividly holding my own call in my hands freshman year at BYU. I didn't open it right when I got it because Deborah was going to get hers the same day, and we had planned on opening them together. I remember thinking how two whole years of my life were in that large packet addressed from the Office of the First Presidency. Two whole years all on one small sentence that started: "Dear Elder Bjarnason, You have been called to serve in the..."

I wanted to hold Denise's mission call, knowing that 18 months of her life was in that packet.

I went over to her apartment. Lindsay and I joked about steaming it open, but of course we didn't. Lindsay asked me what I thought about Denise going on a mission. I told her I thought it was great. Denise was going to be a great missionary wherever she went. Lindsay looked me in the eye, and said "No, what do you really think?" I instantly knew what she was getting at. Somehow she had seen into my heart and knew what I had been thinking about only the night before, ... but how? How could she know? I stammered for a few seconds, completely taken aback that she had figured it all out in such a short period of time. How could she possibly know? And yet, I knew she did. I changed the subject and left, hoping beyond hope that she wouldn't tell Denise.

Later that night, we gathered at Denise's apartment for the opening of the call. We must have packed 50 or 60 people into that small apartment. It was full. Denise opened the call and announced to everyone that she had been called to serve in the Brazil, Goiania Mission. We looked it up - right in the middle of the country. I was happy. Denise was headed to South America. She would largely have experiences very similar to my own.

After everyone dispersed, her family headed off for ice cream, and I got invited along. Denise and I took her car. On the way there, she nonchalantly said "Lindsay says you have something you want to talk to me about." I was floored. Now, not only was my fears about Lindsay knowing totally confirmed, but I also knew that she must have told Denise, and that Denise was expecting some sort of a marriage talk that night. Obviously nervous, I told her that I didn't think we should talk about it on the way to ice cream. Denise seemed confused, but agreed to wait until after ice cream was over.

I spent that hour or so fretting over how to approach the topic. After ice cream, Denise asked me where I wanted to go. I tried to think of somewhere quiet, where we wouldn't be disturbed. We headed to the parking lot of Seven Peaks, a water park in Provo. There in the parking lot, I hemmed and hawed and tried to talk about other subjects. Finally Denise said "What is it Ronny? Just spit it out." I did. Out came: "Denise, there are only three girls in my life that I've ever thought I would be able to marry. The other two are married. You're number three." At that point I think we were both too shocked to realize that I had just said something really stupid. (I later watched the movie "The Bachelor". Chris O'Donnell did the same thing.)

Denise asked me if I would wait for her. I told her no. A few days later, I explained that I didn't think it was appropriate for missionaries to have split loyalties, and that meant not having anyone waiting for them. At that time, I realize now that I probably came across a bit insensitive. Denise asked me what I was going to do about this. Having already been chastised for beating around the bush, I quickly came up with a plan and told her that I would go to the temple the next day to find out if this was right for me. I also explained that she would have to figure out if it was right for her on her own.

We ended up talking for a long time that night - probably two or three hours. After it was all over, she went home and woke up her mom, insisted that she be sitting up, and told her what had just happened. She included the part on exactly how I asked, and her mom was very quick to point out how stupid I sounded (Thanks, Terri). Denise's mom confirmed that Denise started finals the next day (Denise would fail that class), and insisted that Denise get some sleep. Denise didn't think this was very helpful advice.

Next Post: Part 4: The Day After.

FYI: Lindsay has absolutely no recollection of the part she played in tonight's story.

Other memories from Freshman year:
- going ice skating with Ben's ward (why I didn't attend church meetings)
- playing Rook while waiting for the midnight movie
- playing Rook until dawn in Ben's dorm
- playing Rook in the girl's dorm (not until dawn)
- first impressions of me (mostly after seeing me play Rook)